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Children & Young People's Area

If you are a child or young person living with difficulties at home, it can feel very lonely. You don't need to suffer in silence - there are lots of people who can help support you and keep you safe.

Hot topics

What is Child Abuse? Children can be abused emotionally, physically, sexually or they can be neglected. Sometimes, children and young people do not even realise that what is happening is wrong because it is so normal to them. Even worse, sometimes children and young people blame themselves. If you think you might be being hurt or abused, there are things you can do to help adults protect you. It is against the law, and if social workers or the police know that it is happening to you, they need to take action to protect you.

We want to keep you safe from abuse. If you think you are at risk of abuse, or if you are worried about a friend or a sibling, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker who can help you.

If you prefer to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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Have Your Say!

We want to know what you think about us. If you have ever had a social worker, or if you have ever been in care, tell us what it was like.

By hearing from you, we hope to make things better for other children and young people.

Email us: lscb@haringey.gov.uk

Call us: 020 8489 1472


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Bullying

Bullying can happen to anyone. This can mean that people are calling you names, pushing you, taking things off you, spreading rumours about you, ignoring you, threatening you, talking about you - and it can happen in school, at home, by text or online (see Safe with Technology).

No one has the right to bully you.

Being bullied can make you feel very sad, and as if you are the problem - this is not true.

If you are being bullied, you should let a teacher or your parents know about it. They will do things to stop it happening.

Useful Link:

Childline (external link)


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Parents Arguing & Fighting

It feels really bad to hear or see parents arguing and fighting. Most parents disagree about things and argue from time to time, but if your parents fight a lot, you may be living with domestic violence.

Living with domestic violence can be frightening and confusing. You might feel worried, scared, lonely, tired and angry. If the fighting in your house is physical, you might be at risk of being hurt too.

The fighting is not your fault, even if they argue about you.

It may not be safe in your home. It is important that you tell another person what is happening. This person might be a family member who does not live in your house, or a teacher, a nurse, a doctor or a neighbour.

If you think you are living with domestic violence, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker in Haringey.

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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Parents Breaking Up

When parents break up, you can feel really sad and lonely.

It can change your life and make things more difficult. Sometimes you will need to travel between two homes - which can be difficult because you may not always have everything you are used to in both places. Sometimes you won't see one of your parents much anymore which can feel lonely.

Parents can continue to argue after they separate and sometimes they will argue about you.

Try telling your parents how their breakup and arguing makes you feel. It may help for you to have a regular routine so that you can cope with the changes.

Sometimes talking to someone outside the family can help:

The Children's Society (external link) has made a written agreement you can use in discussions with your parents.

Useful Link

Childline (external link)


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Gangs & Serious Violence

Gangs and serious youth violence are a major concern for young people living in Haringey.

Being part of a gang can make young people feel safe and like they belong. Sometimes, young people don't feel they belong at home or in the community - so being in a gang is the first time they really feel part of something.

Some gangs are involved in crime and they may try to get you involved in it. Gang members might carry knives or other weapons. This might be to show off or as a threat to others. Although carrying a weapon might make gang members feel safer, it actually puts them at much greater risk of being harmed themselves.

If you are being pressurised to join a gang, or are having trouble leaving a gang, you can contact:


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So-called 'Honour'-based Violence & Forced Marriage

So-called honour-based violence can involve the use or threat of violence to control family or community members' behaviour. There is no honour in violence, kidnap, rape and murder.

So-called honour-based violence can lead to people being denied the right to exercise choice and control over their own lives.

It can include forced and early marriage, dowry-related incidents and female genital mutilation.

If you think you or someone you know is at risk of so-called 'honour'-based violence, please contact the police immediately: 999.

Forced Marriage Unit Helpline: +44 020 7008 0151


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Safe with Technology

Using the Internet and other technology helps us keep in touch with friends and family.

But the Internet and mobile phones can also be used for cyber-bullying. The Internet also is an easy way for dangerous people to get closer to children and young people.

Tips for keeping safe:

  • If someone you don't know contacts you, or if you are being bullied online, let someone know
  • On social networking sites, such as Facebook, never use your real name or personal things about yourself like your address and phone number, or the name of your school
  • Don't post pictures of yourself that you wouldn't feel comfortable with people like your teachers or grandparents seeing - once pictures are posted online, they can be re-posted elsewhere
  • Keep your passwords private
  • Don't meet anyone you have chatted to online without a safe adult present

Read more about online safety on the ChildLine (external link) site.

'Sexting'

Young people sometimes send out naked pictures of themselves by text or over the Internet. Unfortunately, what a young person meant to be seen by one person only can get sent around the whole school or community in a matter of minutes.

You should know that, when it is not just between two people for personal use, it is a serious criminal offence to send out naked pictures of people under 16 years of age either by text or over the Internet - and could result in the person sending the pictures being registered as a sex offender.

If you think you are at risk online, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker in Haringey.

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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Drinking or Taking Drugs

When parents drink too much or take drugs, they can become difficult to be around. They might not focus on you and your needs when they are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Drugs and alcohol also change behaviour and can make people angry or violent. If you are affected by a parent's drinking or drug-taking, let someone outside of your family know. This person might be a family member who does not live in your house, or a teacher, a nurse, a doctor or a neighbour.

If you yourself are using drugs and alcohol, you might be trying to escape your own problems. Unfortunately, using drugs and alcohol could be affecting your health, development and your ability to keep yourself safe.

  • Haringey Young Person's Alcohol Worker: 0800 389 5257
  • Haringey Drug & Educational Support - provides drug, alcohol and tobacco education and advice for schools: 020 8489 2233
  • Cosmic - provide direct support with children and families, parenting skills, play and activity sessions for families affected by drug and alcohol misuse - freephone: 0800 389 5257 (children only)
  • Drugs Advisory Service Haringey (DASH): 020 8489 4011
  • In-volve Haringey - supports young people (13 - 21) who are using drugs or alcohol, or who are affected by someone else's drug or alcohol use: 020 8493 8525
  • Release - drugs and legal advice for users, families and friends: 0845 450 0215

Download Haringey's Drug and Alcohol Support & Treatment Service Directory (PDF, 233Kb)

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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Young Carers

Young carers are children and young people who spend some of their time looking after someone else - usually a family member who is mentally or physically ill or has some form of disability which means they need help.

Being a young carer forces the child or young person to take on much more responsibility than is normal for their age, and can cause a lot of worry and stress.

Haringey has a Young Carers Project (external link) that can support you by giving you someone to listen to you, offering support and they also organise activities and trips with other young carers like yourself. Call them to find out more: 020 8211 7764


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Mental Health Problems

Mental illnesses include problems like depression, bipolar, personality disorders and schizophrenia.

About 25% of all people have mental health problems during their lifetime and, with the right medical help, they can be good parents in spite of the mental illness.

Sometimes, parents don't know they are ill, or they stop taking their medication.

Some of the behaviours that come about with mental illness are frightening for the child or young person, and may mean the child or young person has to take care of the parent rather than the other way around.

If you are worried about a parent's mental health, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker in Haringey.

If you are worried about your own mental health, speak to a parent or relative, your GP or a teacher that you trust. They can refer you to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) to find out more, if needed.

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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Female Genital Mutilation (FGM)

FGM is practised in certain cultures. FGM is against your human rights. It is against the law in the UK, and it is against the law to leave the country to practise FGM. If you think you or someone in your family may be affected by FGM, please call the First Response Service and speak to a social worker.

FORWARD (external link) is a not-for-profit organisation that provides support and advice for girls and women at risk of FGM.


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Sex & Relationships

Part of keeping safe and healthy is making sure that you make safe and healthy decisions around sex and relationships, and knowing how to get help if you are being asked to do things that make you feel uncomfortable.

Relationships

Relationships are about love and respect. In a good relationship, whether it is a friendship or romantic, you should feel comfortable talking about your thoughts and feelings. Relationships with people who love and respect you should make you feel good about yourself.

An important rule around consent (being able to say yes to something without feeling forced in any way) in relationships is that you should always feel comfortable saying no to the other person. Remember that if you don't feel able to say no in a relationship, you can't ever truly say yes.

Safe Sex

Pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs) are a serious risk for sexually active people - so it is important that you keep yourself safe.

Having children young will make your life more difficult and more stressful and you will have less time for education and socialising. Children born to young parents are less likely to do well at school.

The highest rates of transmission of sexually transmitted infections, such as HIV, are among heterosexual young people under the age of 18. Other STIs, such as Chlamydia or the HPV virus, may go unnoticed but can have serious consequences such as infertility and cancer. Pill or injection forms of birth control do not protect you from STIs, so it is always safer to use a condom as well.

For more information, see the NHS Sex and Young People site (external link).

Teenage Pregnancy and Parenthood

If you think you may be pregnant, or are a young parent living in the borough - you will need advice to make important choices.

Haringey has a Teenage Pregnancy and Parenthood Service (external link) to support you.

Important contact numbers:

Under 16 years old
Telephone 020 8489 2235 or 07817 164 733

Between 16 years old and under 20 years old
Telephone 020 8489 1884 or 07971 308 895

Teenage Father Worker
Telephone 07980 316 761

Sexual Orientation & Gender Identity

If you feel confused about your sexual orientation, you can contact Youth Wise, which is part of Wise Thought - Haringey's Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans (LGBT) Network (external link). Young LGBT people meet once a month on the second Thursday between 5pm and 7pm. For more information, please contact Youth Wise on 020 8889 9555.

If you think you are a victim of bullying or assault on the grounds of your sexual orientation, please contact Haringey's LGBT Police Officer on 020 8345 0987.

If you are struggling with your gender identity, the Child and Adolescent Gender Identity Development Service (external link) may be able to help on 020 7794 8262.

Sexual Abuse

If you think you are being sexually abused - don't suffer alone: you should let someone know, such as a teacher, a social worker or a police officer.

Sexual Exploitation

Sexual exploitation is where young people are groomed into relationships where they provide sexual services for the benefit of a third party. It can be difficult to get out of these relationships but it is important that you let someone know if you think you are in trouble.

Domestic Violence

If you are sometimes scared of your partner or if they hit you, you may be experiencing domestic violence in your relationship. It is never OK for someone to hurt you - you may need to get help.

Getting Help

If you think you are at risk of sexual abuse, assault or sexual exploitation, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker in Haringey.

See above for sex texting (or sexting).

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call Childline (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111

Useful Links


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If you think you need help because of any of the issues on this page, you can contact the First Response Service and speak to a social worker in Haringey.

If you are worried about anything and you would like to speak with someone in confidence, you can call ChildLine (external link) at any time of day or night: 0800 1111


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